if god wants us
to transform ourselves
into higher beings
by making conscious choices
which ignore our animalistic drives
why would god gives us
a super specific idiot-proof
text manual for that?

when i was young
i wanted to make
an artwork:

a chess video game
in which chess ai
is actually conscious
and can only communicate
by moving pieces,
and it is up to the players
to have the patience
to understand it.

maybe i will make
this artwork
before i die.

writing poems
allows me to express
my smallest single isolated ideas
without the burden
of wrapping it up
in a bullshit narrative
or proving it with
bullshit imaginary experiences.

poems are
smallest indivisible particles
of conscious thought
made for sharing.

they are literally you,
you create and shape another conscious being,
they expand your capacity for love,
they help you understand yourself
they make you better,
they offer the highest level of connection,
they are your best friend.

i physically died
but i was still conscious.

it took me few moments
to realize that this is afterlife,
that i exist as a spirit
and that i did not end
with my body.

i felt enormously happy.
i was terrified of death
all my life
and there is no death.

but then i thought
what if this ends as well?