thank you to 150 or so people
who liked my parenting poem
on instantgram.

if i could somehow convert you
to each of you giving me 10,000 usd
i could finally make that down payment
for my ass-to-lower back hair transplant.

i always wanted my lower back
to be as hairy as my ass
and you can make my dream come true.

i really did not want
to write a poem
and i really had
nothing to say
so i wrote this poem

please rate this poem
from zero to ten.
ten is the best poem
you every read in your life.
zero is a piece of shit.
thank you.

i was in san francisco
for seventeen minutes
and i got so worried
that i could not write a poem
for three weeks.

but today i listened to
pavarotti singing nessun dorma
and when he sang vincerò
i fully recovered
and wrote this poem.

i told rafael i will write a poem
about how miltos chose art
instead of a giros restaurant chain
but then i felt bad about making fun
of miltos’ horrible life choices
and decided not to write that poem

ένα ποίημα
in fünf Sprachen
is easy to write
ma è molto difficile
да сe чита

last night a friend reminded me
that i should write poems more often.

at that very moment in my head
i came up with the best poem ever.

but this morning i forgot most of it
and all i remember is:
mayonnaise and béchamel
are not so hard to make at home.

i remember
how long long time ago
i would go out,
have a nice dinner,
get a bit tipsy,
listen to some cool music
on my way home,
and write a poem
as soon as i got back.
i just do not do that anymore.

this poem is written
in a scottish accent
and should be read
in a scottish accent

i have seen a lot of clouds
since my last clouds poem
written 19 october 2023.

some were isolated,
some were fast,
one looked like a hook,
all were very cool.

the more people are pressured
by a poorly designed inflexible system
the more crime there will be.

so there are no
naturally bad people aka criminals
but only poorly designed systems
which create criminals
out of naturally good people.

designers of systems
(and everything designed is a system)
should be careful
not to make good people into criminals
by making design errors.

bad person aka criminal
is a good person who does not fit
the design of a system
and the system does not want
to listen and adjust to them.

artificial intelligence
will never be able
to write this poem

i do not know
when i will write
my first poem
in year 2024
but it will not be soon

i felt sorry
that i did not write
more poems this week
but then i realized
that when i am dead
no one will care
if i wrote one or hundred
poems in a week.

irena told me
i should
write a poem today.

i said: fuck that,
i will not write poems
on a saturday.

i wanted to write a poem
but i decided
to play monopoly
with my kids
instead

sometimes
it is difficult
to write a poem
but not because
i have nothing to say
but because i am lazy

today would be
a good day
not to write a poem

sometimes
i just think how
poems about clouds
are stupid.

but then i see clouds
and remember
how cool they are,
but i still do not write
a poem about them.

i told my friend
that he should check out
my poems
because
i wrote a poem about him.

but that was a lie.
i did not write a poem
about him.

i am very confused
by this poem.
i really do not understand it.
please help me.
what does this poem mean?
what is it about?

random pseudo philosophical political rant
clouds
my kids
self-glorification
ass kissing
a call to call me

please let me know?

i do not understand
why all of you
do not write poems.
it is so easy.
just write a poem now!

every time when
i do not write poems
for a long time
i wish to start again with
a very important poem

this poem
is trying to say
some very difficult things
and i really need
your help
in figuring it out,
so please read it well.

i am very sorry
but today
i am too lazy
to write a poem

i will resist
and not write
a pretentious philosophical poem
today

sometimes
i really really want to
write a poem about clouds
because poems about clouds
became some kind of a
special thing
which is weird.
i hope i have not ruined it
again.

1000 years ago
york was old
but then it became new
and that is it.
this is a stupid poem.
i thought it would be better.
i am very sorry.

if i do not
write a poem today
it will be a shitty day

if i do nothing all day
or i am an asshole all day
and i write at least one poem
and publish it online
then i believe
it was a good day

an old man wrote
the most powerful poem
in his head
just before he died

the phrase
“while i drift into nihilism”
was repeating in my head
and i felt i should write
a poem about it,
but i had no idea
how to actually use it
or what it means

i like to write poems
about poems
because not many people
can do something
about that something
so it is special

please
do not underestimate
how difficult it is
to write
these shitty poems.

each of them needed
a unique moment of
desperate agency.

it is impossible
to write a perfect poem
because poems use language
and language is always
fucked up and wrong
and it is up to the reader
to figure them out

one day with a lot of hard work
and extreme dedication
and with impossible sacrifices
i will write poem 1000.

i will suffer and endure.
i hope i make it.
i will survive.
i will do it.

cross your fingers.
pray for me.
thank you for your support.

i really do not want to
write this poem
but something is forcing me to

after a few days
of not being in a mood
to write poems
i finally wrote a poem

this poem reflects
all my despair and hope
and is not a showoff project
by a corporate programmer

this poem is a fable
about animals
who can speak
but choose not to speak

there is a secret
behind my poor grammar
which i revealed in this poem

few days ago
i wrote a poem in which
a complete word was missing
and i still shared it
and some people liked it

the only real turn on in sex
is the pleasure of your partner.
everything else
is only a way to reach this
no matter
how complicated and weird it gets.

being just a bit scared of sex
is healthy.
when you stop being scared
you will start having bad sex
or even not have sex anymore.

using butter, mustard, and bbq sauce
in sex
is better than
having no sex at all.

guys,
watching busty shemales on females porn
is less gay than hetero porn,
but having sex with a shemale
is very gay.

girls,
if a guy wants
to put a finger in your ass
this does not mean
he wants a finger up his ass.
you are welcome.

sometimes i just want to relax
and not write about the world
and just write about clouds

just because
i did not write poems about clouds
does not mean i do not look at them anymore

all my life
i have been searching for god
and every day i am closer

i hope that
before i die
i write a poem 10054

kyle liked my poem on instagram.
then i saw on instagram that he wrote a poem similar to mine.
then we chatted on instagram.
then we spoke on zoom about all kinds of things.
this was a really cool experience.
thank you kyle.

i think therefore i am
is not correct
because if we do not talk
to other people
we do not exist.

actually,
if we do not fight
with other people
we do not exist.

skynet came back to our time
and understood
that it is more efficient to kill people
by slowly replacing human creative activities
with artificial intelligence
than directly fight them.

so skynet invested in film, media, art companies
rewarding artificial intelligence projects
and impoverishing non-automated creative workers
slowly replacing all human creativity
with fully automated content
turning all humans into stupid passive consumers.

the only remaining resistance were poets
who have hidden deep underground
to escape anti-poetry drone terminators
because skynet could never automate writing poetry
which would fool people into believing that it is real
because poetry is actually not so easy to create.

the worst way
to write a poem
is to try to write a poem.

you will either
wait for seven hours
to get a decent idea
or you will write
a shitty poem
like i just did.

for few days
i did not write poems
and i felt bad about it.

i wanted to write poems
about credit cards,
my kids as forty year olds,
and some other stuff,
but no poems really emerged.

that is it. that is the poem.

as i said before
my goal is to write
a perfect poem which saves all people.

to achieve this
i must practice writing every day
and focus on the most abstract level
of the human experience.

most importantly
i must find the perfect moment
to write this poem
which is the last moment of my life
when i am still fit to write.

the biggest challenge is
to know when is
my last poetry writing moment
and capture it.

i would like to write a poem
which can free all of us from all pressures
and help us transcend the human condition

in a previous poem
i forgot to add a dot.

when i realized this
at first i was worried
but then i realized
that this is the proof
that i am spontaneous
and honest
so i stopped worrying.

tourism could have been
a personal discovery of human diversity

but actually it is about
going to another country
and giving locals a ton of money
to act as our slaves
while we pretend to be royalty
for a week or two.

sorry for such a cynical poem.
i was thinking if i should write it
for a whole week.

i love tourism.
but it is ruined!
but i love it!

if we laugh
at that the porsche owner
for compensating for something,
then we are also compensating for something,
and this poem is also compensating for something,
but what is that something?

for a long time
it was my dream
to visit sicily.

finally i will do it
with irena and the kids
this july.

if you have any tips
or want to meet
email me at nikola@tosic.com.

i got carried away
with writing complex poems.
sometimes i read them later
and i have no idea
what they are about.
here is a simpler poem
so we can all relax a bit.

the benefit
of such abstract poem
is that it describes
a specific conflict situation
which can be recognized
in millions problems
until the end of time.

it is not relevant
why william blake
wrote it in the first place.

only the most
abstract, essential, and immutable
concepts of the poem
will survive the time
as universal values.

this proves that
the human ability to abstract
is the main component
of cooperation.

which is why i am upset
that coca cola is not democratic,
which i am sure
william blake would agree with.

because love
can make us suffer
it would be useful
to control it
a bit.

if you fall in love
with someone who will hurt you
move away
and you will forget them
in a week or a month.

it is no different
from quitting drinking
or losing weight.
it is hard
but not impossible.

i tried to sell my nft poem about khet thi
and promised to donate the money
to his wife.

it depressed me
that this is the only nft i did not sell.
i thought it would sell quickly.

it was a test.
maybe sometimes i should not test things
and just enjoy the illusion.

sometimes i write
too many nice and smart poems
and then i feel a need to write
a poem that reminds me and you
that i am also an asshole and an idiot
but those poems
again turn out nice and smart.
i guess i can not help it:
i am a nice and smart poet.

promoting harmless hypertension medicine
gives me an opportunity
to write a poem that
saves lives
and extends consciousness
for hundreds of millions of years

i will not
write a poem today.
i am not into it.
i am bored to do it.
it feels like a chore.
my head is empty
and i have nothing to share.
maybe tomorrow
i will write one
but, sorry,
today there are
no new poems.

i am sorry
that i did not publish poems
in the last two weeks.

i did a road trip
across italy
with irena and the kids.

i wrote this poem
as if someone noticed
and cared.

i am very worried
about the world
so i wrote
many poems about it

to give you a break
here is a happy poem
so you do not think
i am only a grumpy poet

why did the chicken cross the road?
to read a happy poem

will asked me
to write a poem about
politics, current events, and futurism
so here goes:

rap music allows storytelling
which makes it an important step
towards a future in which
we are all immortal and equal

in this future we get the most
out of our consciousness
because we have all the time in the universe
without the distractions of inequality

eminem is an important step
because he helped make rap
the most popular music in the world
making all its messages available to everyone

kanye continued eminem’s work
making rappers
the most important fighters
for the future of humanity

eminem and kanye are helping
to make the future humans immortal and equal
because scientist dedicate their lives
to whatever is on mass media

only rap can make immortality and equality
more popular than mass media
and we can not do anything
without scientists

i love metal, rock, pop, classical,
and some country
but my bet is on rap
because of public enemy

there is an instant automatic death penalty
for any form of a conflict,
even the smallest one
like a coffee order dispute

this world offers nothing but fear!
i will die soon so i must do something now!
fuck you all!

you never know
when you will write
a good poem

you write a lot of
really bad poems
and suddenly
there is a good one

she is so scary
that i am afraid
to even write a poem
about her

get
the fuck out
of my home
or i will
cut your eyes out!
i am better
than you
and i will rape you!

when bob dylan
won the nobel prize for literature
i was skeptical about his poetry
since i never read it.
i decided to check if it is any good
and i found one of his poems online
and read it
and it was a very very very very good poem.
a really good poem.
and i thought that
it was good that he got the prize.

today i was teaching my daughter
how to design a portfolio
and i was showing her ryder ripps website
and i randomly opened his 200 obvious ideas poem
and it was as good as bob dylan’s poem.

@stoebels wanted to buy a poem
but did not.
so i gave him something
gazillion times better:
i wrote this poem about him.

if all
managers,
investors,
lawyers,
accountants,
investors,
analysts,
consultants,
would write poems
and include them in their work
everyone would make much more money
and the world would be a much better place.

wait for a political event
watch all the main news about it
find something obvious that no news wants to mention
write a poem about it

this is a poem
about my suggestion to
jpren.eth
to write a poem
about his purchase
of my poem
on foundation.app

reading one poem only
is as if you watched
the worst and cringiest
7 seconds of
a single marvel movie

this poem
collection of my poems
all poems i wrote
all poems written by everyone now
all poems written by everyone ever
everything written by everyone ever
everything communicated by everyone ever
everything thought by everyone ever
everything ever

feeling
dream
poem
comic book
movie
politician
engineer

since my father died
i wrote many gloomy poems
i promise
the next one will be funny

i wrote a lot of poems about rafael
and a lot of poems about death
but not so many about rafael and death.
finally rafael called me to ask me
about my father’s death
and it gave me an idea this poem
about rafael and death.
thank you rafael.

for a while
i wanted to write a poem
about ryder ripps
but then i was distracted
by my father’s death
and i can not remember
if i did write a poem about him
and i am too lazy
to use control eff to search
but i am still impressed
by him or something he did
but i do not remember what
because i was distracted

i was very lazy
to write this poem
but i did it

are you ready?
here goes!

our consciousness is
not in our brains
but is accessed
by our brains.

everyone is religious
because our whole lives
we give gifts to gods
so they spare us
from death.

progress of humanity
is hijacked
by those
who fear the most.

bam!
do you like it?
am i smart?

let me try put this life lesson
into a semi decent poem:
the main thing about
the things you have
is that they cost more
to keep then to get.
and i am not talking about
houses and money and that stuff.
hope that makes
some sense to someone.

i just felt like writing a poem
because writing a poem
makes me feel
like i did something
really good

this is the first time
i am using a link
in a poem

this is
the most boring poem
ever written

i was taking a shower
and i spotted a shampoo bubble
on the shower door.
in my entire life
i never saw a bubble like that.
for a moment
i was thinking to take a photo
but then i decided
to just let it be,
and then i blew it off.
then i decided to
write this poem,
but i panicked that i might
forget the bubble.

it took me
four months
to write
this poem

no special effect is as good
as the imagination of a person
reading a poem.

i hope
that someone
will actually
do the whole thing
and publish
their poem online

for disappointing you
by not doing more
to make the world better.
we were lazy and stupid
maybe we could have
skipped sleeping or slept more.
i do not know.
if you also
disappoint your kids
just copy paste this poem.

on facebook i saw
an image of a poem
which appeared like mine
but it was a poem
by ren hang.
i got scared
that he did the same thing
i wanted to do
but before me.
i felt angry at him
and sorry for my laziness.
but then i read that he died
and i felt safe again.
also i read few of his poems
and they seemed depressing
and my poems are not depressing.
so i won in my mind for now.

long time ago
poems manipulated
the readers
with cheap emotions
and distracted
with useless rhyme.
well, not anymore.

wind
orange
witch
scary
black
night
spooky
candy
bat
pumpkin

i was browsing nonsense websites
for six hours
doing absolutely nothing useful
and thinking how i am wasting time

i somehow ended up listening
the animals’ house of the rising sun
and then it hit me
why war is just such shit

i felt an urge to share
this revelation
and i realized that the best way
is to write a poem

here goes

very smart people can easily
understand themselves and others
which helps them discover
nonviolent productive solutions

not very smart people
can not understand much
and they can not say the right things
and they end up communicating with violence

it takes a very smart person
to make everybody happy
for them it is easy
just like swimming is for champion swimmer

not very smart person
has problems figuring things out
and gets confused
and makes a mess

this is why war just such shit
because it is a product of morons
it is that simple
share this poem

selling is like swimming
it takes a lot of time to learn
and is not natural
but if you do not learn
you drown

this is the last poem
i will ever write

i hope
someone asks me
a question
that makes me feel
like someone gets me
you know
what i mean?

it takes
only few seconds
to write a poem

no one can
really tell if its
good or bad

there is
a tiny chance
kids will have
those stupid
what-does-it-all-mean
discussions
in school
about your poems

while musicians
and painters
need decades
to perfect their
abilities

you do not need
any education or training

the less you know
better your poetry
will be

you hardly need
to know how to spell
or even speak

if no one
has any clue
what your poems
are about
this is perfectly
acceptable

yet poems are
somehow
so very cool

just so
very very cool

i will
NEVER
write a poem
about
die antwoord

if you drive a cat
you have to learn not to
open the red cucumber
because
i was in the school
yoodle doo
ok and than it hit me
black is not back
and mice do not eat computers
at least not when
i transmit
you egomaniac
i hate you

2 cool
2 b doped

a quick poem
about koyaanisqatsi
just before
i go out

i just wrote this title out of the blue
and have no idea what this poem will be about
nor i know much about cocoabutter
apart that its probably mostly fat

why would someone
at the age of twenty eight
with almost no career,
focus and daydream completely
on writing this poem
and on nothing else,
is that a loser or
winner mentality?

blind man is touching a grater
and than he says:
who wrote this bullshit?

this is a really cool poem
i am writing it now
and i dont know how it will continue
but im sure its the best one i wrote so far
awesome!